Wednesday, August 24, 2011

10 Weeks to go

Spent some time with Elle yesterday; Its was good to see her and chat for awhile.  Her reassurance that this baby is ours is priceless.  She may never know what she is doing for divine it is and what it took to get us here. 

I am grateful today for my infertility and should I dare to say...our miscarriages.

It takes a mouthful of deep breaths to say that aloud; a core response; a hard thought.  Its not easy to say.  I do mean it though. 

I look at FNF and the women who surround me; the women that I surround; and see it all working together for the good of ....the good of God :)

He is good, that's what I am remembering today.  If only I could keep this truth engulfing me so that I wouldn't forget and start looking inward again.  Its so effortless to slip back into falseness.  This time I'll try to keep truth around a bit longer...and remember it a bit faster when I'm feeling down.

10 weeks left to go...give or take.  10 weeks and we will see his face...the face of promises and dreams that have been moving stories in my heart for years upon years.  I await you little one.

Friday, August 19, 2011

My publication by Ilana

After learning that Mommy was doing a "publication" in the Swiss City Monthly; Ilana insisted that she type up her own publication today to tell everyone about herself.  Before I knew it she had Microsoft Word opened and was writing away.  I left some of her typos that the computer didnt catch and just thought I would share with you the heart of my little girl.

I   like    my      friends.      I      am     a       kid.          My         name     is   Ilana. I love god he is  in my heart and he is the  best.  And    I   like my birthday.  My birthday is in December 9th.  I love my grandma. When I was a baby I was excited to see my new mom and I was laughing. I like flowers and butterflies.  I am a kid that likes butterflies and flowers. And I like my neighbors. I see them in my mind when im sleeping. I use to play with my baby stuff and I love my brother when he comes. I play with farm stuff. I love tanner and daddy. When I grow up I want to be a ballerina andi love my whole entire family. And I am so so so pretty and my friend Katherine we don’t meet each other a lot but we still talk about her. I know that I next week I am going to see myah and I have a myah in my name too. I like my bedroom and I like to sleep on the floor. I really like our little puppy that’s black and white on his chest. And  mom   sings  at  nite  and  in morning I like to sing.             


Thursday, August 18, 2011

Exciting News!

It is definitely time for a major update.  My break from blogging has consumed me as the summer keeps flying by.  Here is a summary of all that has taken place in the last 6 weeks.

FNF Fans...we are on a incredible incline of blessings!  Starting September 1st we will launch the rough draft of our new web site ( We are super pumped!  Not only will it be a great source of information and resources for families, but also a place to call home for couples struggling with infertility & pregnancy loss.  We will have a FNF blog, merchandise for purchase, and awareness for some really great charities!

We are in the process of getting our Nonprofit status and working on our first annual event in Ft Wayne.  On April 14th of next year we will be working side by side with Star 88.3 on a incredible event for families in the surrounding areas! How great is that!!  We are so thrilled they have decided to be our "hosting station" for the event and alongside other sponsors we will be able to bring resources and possibly a concert with Laura Story (fingers crossed and praying hard) to our community!

Sept 1st the Swiss City Monthly, a publication that comes out in Adams co. every month, is featuring Logan & I along with FNF as their cover story :)  We were contacted last month and did personal interviews with their staff about our journeys and vision.  Its been an blessed few months for sure!

With all of this going on it has taken away the slow pace of life as we await our new baby due Nov. 12th.  As the weeks keep slipping by, we get more and more excited to see his little face :)  "Elle" is doing fantastic!  She had some preterm labor a few weeks ago that gave us a scare but since then things have slowed down and went back to normal.  She is ready to be "baby free" as the summer is hot and she is uncomfortable.  Only 11 short weeks remain and then he will be all snuggled up at home.  Elle and I spent our birthdays together last week since they are so close together.  We got manicures/pedicures and went out for dinner...Chads treat :)  It was nice to spend time and just chat about life.  Its amazing what God has done in this whole thing for both of us!

I'm starting to get into "baby mode" cleaning the house, simplifying life, clearing out unwanted things and such.  We started gathering items for baby and its getting fun now.  The scary part seems to have left; there is not much fear that Elle will change her mind or something will happen from now to then.  It just seems right and feels good.  Chad was laying on the couch last night with his eyes closed...I thought he was asleep til I heard him say.."I cant wait til my baby boy is here."  "I know," I said.  Sigh*  I cant believe its almost time.

On the other side of opening our lives to a new baby, our oldest son Tanner has moved out on his own.  Another deep breath.  That's so hard on a momma's heart.  Everyday I miss him.

Well, that's my quick run-down of life here for us.  Please be prayerful for our family, Chad is currently fighting meningitis and mono, Tanner started his senior yr of school today, and Ilana is very patiently waiting for her baby brother.  I continue to work on FNF and hope that God will use all of us for something great!

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